Chihuly’s art blossoms at Bellagio and beyond | Las Vegas

It’ll come as no shock to you that Las Vegas is not the most pleasant city in the world. From the insane cabs that won't hesitate to steamroll you right into the ground, to the borderline-toxic stench wafting from the sewer grates, it's easy to see why the place wouldn't top too many travel lists. But as I sit in this cheap hotel room about two hours from the Strip, typing with the one arm I have left, I know for a fact that I will never return to Las Vegas.
“Hey, hey!” Reggie said as I walked up to the gate. “There he is! what took you so long?” Mike said, giving me a high five. We had been planning this for months. My friend Danny was getting married, and we had decided to have the bachelor party in Vegas. Behind Danny’s back, we had all chipped in to book a suite at the Bellagio hotel. We were obviously pumped for a weekend of slots, booze, and girls. “Where's Danny?” I asked, dropping my carry-on. “Went to the bathroom”, Reggie said, pulling a handful of chips out of a bag under his chair , “ he’ll be back in a minute”. Mike leaned into me and Reggie, and lowered his voice. “Alright boys, final check. Reggie, you booked the room, right?” He blinked a couple of times and scratched his stubbly chin. “Uhh… yeah”. “Awesome. Mitch, you got our rental car?” I held up my receipt. “ Of course”. “Alright!” Mike said a bit too loudly. “Alright what?” A familiar voice rang out from behind us. I turned around to see Danny walking towards us, shaking water off his hands. His khaki pants and button up shirt putting to shame my sweat pants and faded hoodie. “Jesus. Nicole must really be changing you, man”, I said, laughing and pulling him into a hug. “Trust me man, if I had never met her, I’d be naked half the time.” A few minutes later, they called our flight. With a few whoops from Reggie, we boarded the plane.
Two hours later we had touched down in Sin City. Reggie went to check in for the rental car while the rest of us watched the turntables for our luggage. As I absentmindedly watched the perpetual row of bags emerging from the plastic-flap-covered opening, I suddenly felt eyes on me. I raised my eyes from the bags and saw who those eyes belonged to. On the other side of the concourse, leaning against a wall, one guy stood out from the crowd. A black guy in his early twenties, wearing what appeared to be an old timely bellhop uniform. The gold buttons on his crimson jacket gleamed under the fluorescent lights. As I stared at him, with no small amount of confusion, the man whistled at me in two short bursts, equal in pitch, as if he were calling a dog. Dan put his hand on my shoulder, making me jump slightly.
We picked up the rental car and made our way to the Strip. As we gawked at the lavish hotels with flashy signs that could’ve been seen from the stratosphere, Danny turned to me. “ Shouldn't we get to the hotel first?” I smiled at him. “Sounds good to me,” I said turning into the Bellagio’s self parking area. “Wait…” Danny’s eyes lit up “ you didn't..” “ 15th floor.” Danny looked like a kid on Christmas morning. I will never forget that face.
“You didn't tell me you got a suite!” Danny said as he looked around the gigantic room we had rented. “Anything for the man of the hour”, I said, shoving the pocket sized Fireball I had bought on the plane into the mini fridge. “What’re we sitting around here for?” Reggie yelled, emerging from the bathroom. Mike looked up from his phone “ there’s a sick nightclub at Caesars Palace. Let's check it out.”
After shot number four, I was feeling like a king.I made my way from the bar back to my table, through the crowds of people silhouetted against the multicolored lights of the club, and found Danny,Mike,Reggie, and a girl who Reggie introduced as Lolita. After shooting Reggie my
world-famous she’s-not-staying-the-night glare, I took my seat and laughed at the tail end of the joke Mike was telling.
After a few minutes, I noticed a rather out of place man a few feet from our table. He looked like a real greaseball, with a shiny balding head that housed a combover synonymous with the word creepy. Had I not been so hammered, I would have been more suspicious when he walked up to our table. “Hello Gentlemen” He said with a grin that showed off slightly crooked, yellowish teeth. “You seem like the kind of guys that belong in some place other than a cramped one room night club. Perhaps someplace more… exclusive would better suit you.” Eying Danny’s expensive blazer and tie clip, the man leaned in close, putting his hands on the table. “ I'll cut right to the chase: if you follow me, I'll take you to the most exclusive casino in Vegas.” He raised his eyebrows. I turned to see what the guys thought, only to see Danny standing up from his seat, with Reggie close behind. I turned to look at Mike. He shrugged. “What the hell! It's Vegas after all,” Mike stood up and I followed suit, jogging a few paces to catch up with the group. After passing a row of Rocky Horror Picture Show themed slot machines, the greasy man banged open a door marked “Staff Only” to reveal a dark staircase with lights strung on either side of the stairs like a movie theater. Reggie let Lolita go first with a slurred,“ladies first”, Reggie then took a step down,stumbled, and proceeded to slide down the stairs, taking out Lolita like a lone bowling pin. Danny,Mike and I had to grip the handrails as we descended, due to us laughing so hard.
A strange mix of thick perfume and cigarette smoke greeted our nostrils at the bottom of the stairs. Mike could barely hold back a gag as we walked further down the hall. As we rounded a corner, I saw a large golden sign above the main entrance to the casino. “The Thomas Bernard club of Las Vegas” It read, with the image of two dice outlined with fire underneath. “Before everyone gets started, will you follow me please!” The greasy man said, leading us past rows of blackjack tables to a blue metal door that seemed out of place with the rest of the casino. “Here,” said the greasy man, abruptly open the door, “ is where you join the club”.
“Choose anywhere you want, sir.” The tattoo artist said, as Reggie sat down in the chair. If I had been in better shape, I would have thought that a tattoo was a pretty weird membership requirement. “ I'll give you $100 if you get it on your ass” Dan said, giggling. Reggie wasted no time dropping his jeans and pointing out the perfect place on his right cheek. Within the hour, Reggie was holding a mirror to admire the Devil’s Tongue flower that had been printed on his butt. Dan came next, who got his on his left shoulder blade. Mike got his on his bicep. He told us he could make it dance, but winced in pain as soon as he flexed. Reggie practically fell over laughing. I got mine on my left shoulder. As I stood from the chair, the greasy man entered. “All set?” He asked in a jovial tone. We nodded. “Excellent!” The man said, clapping his hands together, “Have fun!”. All four of us exited the room, and Reggie immediately jumped on one of the slot machines, dragging Lolita behind him. Strange, I had forgotten Lolita was even with our group. Did she even get a tattoo? Dan grabbed my shoulder. “ we're headed to the craps table. Come on!”.
An hour later, I was running the craps table like a champion. Cheers went up every time I rolled the dice, and a particularly good looking girl in a short club dress had been making eyes with me across the table the whole time. I jumped out between games and asked if she wanted to grab a drink. After we ordered,the girl grabbed my arm. “Have you heard the rumors about this place?” she whispered to me, with eyes that sparkled with curiosity. “Like what?” I replied, taking a sip of my beer. “Like about the people who run this place? I heard one of them went insane.” She spoke with the voice of an idle teenager, and I found myself slightly on edge as I responded. “Really? Interesting.”my hand curled tighter around the bottle I was holding. The bartender startled me when he walked over to us. “Miss, that's only a rumor. Trust me, I've worked here for almost 30 years. Mr. Bernard and his brother were killed when the boiler underneath their personal ski lodge exploded one winter. Bodies were never recovered. Horrible ordeal.” The bartender said, looking past us into thin air for a second, before turning to help a big buff dude who had just approached the bar. Something had seemed… weird about that bartender. He had rattled that story off almost as if he had memorized it beforehand. Like he’d had to say it more than once .I glanced in the direction the bartender had looked, where two casino security guards were staring directly back at me. “Hey are you ok?” The girl’s words snapped me back to reality, and I was vaguely aware that my hands were shaking. “Yeah” I said, clearing my throat. “Will you excuse me for a second?” She barely got a chance to respond before I was sprinting away from the bar. Something definitely wasn’t right. I needed to find the guys.
Dan wasn’t at the craps table. As I ran down the rows of bright, flashing slot machines, air reeking of cigarette smoke filling my lungs, I began to well and truly panic. I felt like I was drowning on dry land. I needed to find the guys. I must not have been running as straight as I thought; I ran into a group of people, and almost knocked a few down. Turning a corner, I saw Reggie and Lolita, facing a slot machine at the end of the aisle, seated with their backs to me. Relieved, I sprinted over to them. As I got closer, my relief slowly melted into horror.
The first thing I noticed was that Lolita was crying, tears streaming down her face, smearing her cheap makeup and turning her tears black with mascara. Then I noticed that she was whispering something I couldn’t hear into Reggie’s right ear. The third thing I noticed was that Reggie was dead. Not just dead. He looked like a burn victim. Though somehow his shoulder length hair and thick glasses remained in tact, his skin was a sickening, ashy black. His eyes were gone, and his mouth was open in a silent scream of agony. The final thing I noticed, and something that has rattled around in my brain for years, was that Reggie’s right hand was clutching his right buttock. Right where he had gotten his tattoo. His other hand was melted to his phone, where what was left of the screen displayed the frozen image of a phone call marked “Mom”.
I don’t know what I intended to say when I opened my mouth, but before I got the chance, I wretched, and vomited my dinner all over the tacky casino carpet. The room began spinning again, my skull throbbed like my brain had been replaced with a hornets nest. What the hell just happened? Why was no one else helping, or even noticing? That’s when I felt a hand on my shoulder. “ You don’t look well, friend.” The voice was the exact opposite of comforting. I looked up and found myself face to face with the greasy guy that brought us here. He was so close I could smell his rancid breath under a thick shroud of cologne. “Here, come with me.” I wanted to protest, to get this disgusting man away from me, but I was so in shock that I could only stand there as he put a hand on my back and guided me away from Reggie’s corpse. It took me a while to realize that he hadn’t noticed him. Or if he did, he sure as hell didn’t say anything.
The next thing I remember is sitting in a large, comfortable chair. I looked around and found I was in a lavish office, similar in design to the suite we had bought for the bachelor party. One thing that caught my eye, however, was the Devil’s Tongue flower in a vase on the bar. That was when all of the memories of what had happened flooded back into my head. I went to stand up from the chair, but found I was unable to pull myself from it. Why was I so weak? “Don’t bother” a voice came from behind the chair. I heard the sound of wheels on the carpet, and I started panicking all over again. My mind was awash with fear as saw through the large mirror on the wall,what, or rather, who was being brought in.
The greasy man from earlier was wheeling in a wheelchair with an IV bag attached to it, as well as a respirator. But I quickly realized it wasn’t for me. In the chair was what appeared to be the charred corpse of a man, barely more than a blackened skeleton in a pinstriped suit. His eyes were covered by the gauze wrapped around the top half of his head. Even so, the two black stains on the gauze right where his eyes should be made me feel like he could see more of me than I would ever like. Before I had a chance to say anything, ask why I was being shown this horrible sight,the greasy man shot me a wink and left. The door slammed, And as I sat helplessly, the corpse spoke. “Allow me to introduce myself” despite how emaciated he appeared, the “man” spoke with perfect clarity. “ I am Mr. Thomas Bernard. I suppose you’ve already heard about me, though.” Mr. Bernard sharply inhaled through the nasal respirator. “What the hell?” I was able to sputter our in my dazed state. “Yes I know. You’re thinking I should be deep in the Colorado mountains,frozen under layers of ice in the ruins of a long forgotten ski lodge. And above all, I should be dead, right?” My mind warped like heated metal. My mouth could only take in shallow, staccato breathes. What had they done to me? “If you haven’t already guessed, that story is about as true as the cheater at a poker table.” Said what was left of Mr. Bernard, with a chuckle that sounded fit for a crow with a broken neck, “Now I guess, considering you don’t have that much time left, I can tell you about how I came to own this...place”Mr Bernard said, seeming to choose the last word carefully.
“In my prime, I was the greatest businessman on the face of the earth, if I do say so myself. With monopolies in real estate, car manufacturing, and specifically… casinos. I owned some of the most popular casinos in the United States, and ended up bringing more tourists to Nevada then anytime in recorded history. I was a king.”
“ I believe it was a Wednesday. I remember going to sleep in my house, and waking up in a room that I could only describe as...as beautiful beyond the concept of beauty. It was as large as a stadium, surrounded by pillars connected by large, medieval arches. The floor was an intricate, polygonal mural that seemed to shift wherever I stepped. The pillars were covered with carvings. Looking closer, I found that these carvings were all different languages, From English, to French to Korean. Towards the bottom of the pillars, languages that were so old I hardly recognized them. Looking up, I noticed that the arches sat in the middle of the pillars rather than the top, and the pillars rose high above them into murky darkness.” Under the desk, I gained movement in my left big toe.
“A voice emanated from the infinite darkness surrounding me.” Mr. Bernard’s emaciated hands gripped the arms of the wheelchair. “I felt both fear and comfort in that moment. It was a voice unlike any other; Speaking English, yet somehow devoid of any accent or defining speech pattern.”
“ I was dead. I had died in my sleep, and was now in what it referred to as Fegefeuer. And whatever dwelled in this place…” Bernard leaned forward, and I swear I could hear his bones creaking and popping beneath his suit. By now I had completely regained feeling below my left ankle, and was swiftly feeling more and more of my entire leg. “ ...offered me a choice. To my right, a simple, red door appeared. ‘Through that door,’ the voice whispered, ‘is your afterlife. And this…’ from behind me came the bright, twinkling glow. Turning, I saw the geometric tapestry of the floor morph into a city street, and the pillars into Vegas strip signs. ‘is the powerful, regal life you ran prior to this very moment.’ Everything below my waist tingled as though it had fallen asleep, and was regaining feeling.
“I suppose you’ve been wondering why I look the way I do, Mr. Ross.” Bernard said, leaning back in his chair. “ I am a man of chance. My gambling has lead me to the most extravagant experiences and luxuries on this earth. I have also lost fortunes the working man could only dream of. With the future of my existence hinging on one choice… I played it safe.” Even with barely any flesh still attached to his blackened skull, and his eyes covered by bandages, I could clearly see anger spreading across his face, making small pieces of flesh fall like bits of paper into the ashtray on his desk. “It didn’t like that. One. Bit.”
And that’s when Mr Bernard stood up. I don’t know why, of all things, that haunts me the most. The fact that such a spindly, crude mockery of the human form had the ability ( or at least the compulsion) to stand as a man would. “Come one more!” Bernard suddenly roared, pulling me up by the front of my shirt so that we would be eye to eye if his head were not wrapped in gauze, “Maybe now I can sleep!”. I realized very quickly his ramblings were not directed at me, as the vacant stains on the gauze were aimed off in the distance. Beyond the walls of the office.
As quickly as he had lifted me, Bernard dropped me. “Not Enough?” He said, his voice suddenly strained, hands clutching his head. I realized in that moment that all of my feeling had returned. I knocked the chair over sprinting out of the office. Strange enough, it was not locked. As I sprinted down the hallway back to the casino, I began hearing something loud. As I rounded the corner back into the casino, it dawned on me exactly what that sound was. Dozens of voices, all screaming. All around me, people were screaming for help, or groaning in pain. It was then that I started…smelling it. Burning flesh tearing through the tomblike shroud of the casino’s stench. I saw people who seemed healthy an hour earlier crumpling to the floor, clutching at various body parts. I thought nothing. I ran, ignoring the dampness at the crotch of my pants. Ignoring the sweat running into my eyes, causing me to slightly stumble. Ignoring the group of three people I pushed through. That is, until I heard Danny’s terrified voice. “Mitch! HELP ME!” his voice cracked in desperation, trying to free himself from the grip of the two security guards holding each of his arms. I turned back, dazed and petrified, as I watched my friend get dragged further into the crowds of writhing bodies.
If she had not been there in that moment, I would have never made it to the door ten feet from where I stood. I would have crumpled onto that singed casino carpet and shut down like a robot in a cartoon. But the girl from the bar was there, and I didn’t realize it until she grabbed a hold of my suit jacket. She screamed one word into my face: “Run!”. I lunged to the door, and it came off its hinges as soon as I pulled on the handle. As I fell out into the dark corridor, I turned and watched as the entire casino seemed to...disassemble. Slot machines became bare wires and sparking lights. Roulette wheels telescoped upwards in layers. The ceiling seemed to melt into concrete and steel beams. My eyes were fixed, however, on the girl in the black dress, crawling on her elbows towards the doorway. I hadn’t noticed how radiant her light green eyes were, until the moment before her head was crushed by a large antique fire extinguisher. Her defined cheekbones and long brunette hair were suddenly lost in a mess of blood and jagged teeth. My eyes rose to the person responsible, and I initially could not understand what I was seeing. I knew it was the man who had lead us to the club, but his face was nothing more than a pile of flesh that wouldn’t look out of place on the Elephant Man. Bulbous skull, eyes swollen shut, and a wide mouth with no teeth. A mouth that was laughing.
I heard footsteps behind me, and turned to see the man in the bellhop uniform, the one who I had seen in the airport. He walked forward until he stood parallel with me, and turned. He gave me an acknowledging nod, then walked into the casino. As he did, the doorway gave off a blinding white light. There was a sound like lightning hitting a gas truck. Then, nothing. I stood up, and stared at the solid concrete wall where the hellish casino had stood. I knew then that I had witnessed something no one else would believe.
People gave me strange looks as I walked down the strip, but I hardly noticed. I made it to the rental car, and the next thing I remember is standing at the front desk of a motel.
I sat on the bed,not knowing what to think or feel. My questions outnumbered my answers one thousand to one, and even attempting to comprehend the tiniest things: The guards, her eyes, the roulette wheel breaking,that bellhop… and Danny’s voice, saturated with terror, fading into the dynn of screams. My phone buzzed on the bedside table, and I didn’t have to look to see it was Nicole calling me again. I stood and looked out the window, at the sun rising over the barren desert. Staring into that crimson ball of gas, all of my anger and confusion funneled into one solid pit in my stomach. I felt so… small. It took me a second to notice the burning pain shooting down my arm. I heard myself yelling, and felt the pain pulsing in my left shoulder. I frantically removed my shirt to see that the veins around the Devil’s Tongue tattoo had turned black. One more answer I didn’t need.
I spent hours cutting off my arm in the bathtub with the swiss army knife I kept in my back pocket. I used my belt as an improvised tourniquet, and bit down on one of the bath towels. I was scared when the first blood started to drip. After a while, it became nothing more than a morbid chore, intercut by crying and grunting from the pain. When I had finished,I covered my stump with the towel. The ambulance should be on its way right about now. We’ll see if it runs into any stubborn taxi drivers along the way.

Just returned from the most epic week in Las Vegas with my husband! We budgeted about $1000 per person for the week, all expenses included. We went over by a couple hundred in the end. We planned a lot of activities and sightseeing in advance to avoid gambling too much out of boredom. We weren't very lucky at anything except blackjack, but we were able to leave Vegas at only $40 in the hole between the two us, which I consider a moderate success! And we weren't bored for a minute!
Day 1 (Wed 10/19)

• I flew from NC to Vegas on Frontier at $191 roundtrip after taxes and fees. It wasn't a luxurious experience, but I wasn't expecting it to be. I packed a medium-sized backpack within the "personal item" dimensions so I wouldn't have to pay a $35 carry-on fee. No employee measured (or even glanced at) my bag either way. My husband had a work conference in Vegas the following week and was allowed to bump his flight up a week, so his flight (Southwest) was already covered.
  
• Rented a car from Enterprise via a third-party site called carrentals.com. We got a new Toyota Corolla for the week at $151 after tax (just under $22/day). Used a Lyft credit to pick the car up at the location off Las Vegas Blvd, since it was about 5 times more expensive to rent from the airport location. All totally worth it! We used the car a lot each day. I would definitely rent a car again if I returned to Vegas. Next time I would probably take more advantage of free valet parking on the strip.
  
• Stopped by In-N-Out Burger for lunch. So good.
  
• Grabbed a some shelf-stable groceries to keep in our room. We made sandwiches here and there for odd meals and when we were driving or doing outdoorsy things. Saved us some money on drinks, snacks, and breakfast as well.
  
• Took a lap around Miracle Mile Shops to kill some time before check-in at 3. Pretty nice mall. Wanted to see the indoor rainstorm on the hour but never did locate it.
  
• I had booked a room at Mandalay Bay for 2 nights at $77/night with a $75 dining credit on the hotel's website using a promo code I found on smartervegas.com. At check-in I asked if there were any upgrades available, and we were offered to upgrade to the Delano for an additional $30 a night. We went ahead and did it, because why not?
  
• Before dinner, we grabbed drinks at Skyfall Lounge at the top of the Delano. We went during their happy hour, called "Sunset Hour," and watched a beautiful sunset over Vegas. Even the toilets had a view. I would recommend reservations--we had reservations and were allowed to sit at much better tables (on the balcony) than those without.
  
• For dinner, we went to Wolfgang Puck's LUPO Restaurant to use the rest of our dining credit. I also had a credit for a free bottle of wine from the MyVegas app. This meal wasn't bad, but I didn't think it was delicious enough to justify how much it cost. I had a steak that I didn't think was a great cut, and my vegetables were over-seasoned and over-salted. The atmosphere was nice but somewhat boring. I probably wouldn't bother dining here again, personally. We had a reservation but didn't need it. The place was mostly empty.
  
• After dinner, we saw Penn and Teller at the Rio. We got discounted tickets through Travelzoo at $46/person. Very good show. Penn and Teller came out front for pictures afterward. Teller talked to us!
  

Day 2 (Thurs 10/20)

• Woke up to a window washer hanging outside the window.
  
• Had a late brunch/early lunch at Ellis Island. No frills, good value and large portions.
  
• Went on a free tour of a light art installation called Akhob by James Turrell hidden in a secret floor in the Louis Vuitton Store at the Shops at Crystals. This was such an awesomely strange experience! We had fun feeling like we were "in" on a secret, and the installation itself was also very cool. Reservations are definitely required for this one. They said they were booked out about a month.
  
• Walked around CityCenter. The Shops at Crystals and Aria were beautiful and had many sights to see (water features, art exhibits, etc.). We wandered into Vdara as well, which looked very nice, but was not much to look at in terms of sightseeing.
  
• Visited Bellagio. A definite must-see in Vegas. We watched our first fountain show (our first dose of "Uptown Funk"), walked through the garden conservatory, admired the Chihuly glass in the lobby, took a look at the chocolate fountain, and shared a cup of gelato.
  
• Took a 30-minute ride on the High Roller Observation Wheel. I was lucky enough to nab a voucher for $25 for 2 for a daytime ride with open bar a couple months ago on Travelzoo (prices have gone way up since). We went right as the sun was setting and it was wonderful. The bartender was great and churned out drinks like a boss. She gave us shots to do together as a group at the top, and even made everyone drinks "to go" at the end. If you go, be sure to grab a spot on the side facing the strip (the close side when you walk in).
  
• Had dinner at Gyu Kaku using a Livingsocial voucher I had gotten with a promo code. We had never been to a grill-your-own-meat place before. We got some kind of meat sampler. Everything was delicious. My husband was obsessed. Weirdly, the place was nearly empty, even around 7pm.
  
• Wandered around Caesar's Palace and the Forum Shops. Worth a visit. Watched the fish in the big tank for a few minutes, then caught the 8pm Fall of Atlantis animatronic show. We had a good laugh at the plot of the show and lost it at the king's broken hand dangling and flopping around during his grand gestures. There must have been a screw loose. We thought it was totally hilarious, and it became a running joke of our trip.
  
• Caught the 9pm Fire show at the Mirage. Very cool free attraction to see up close...you can hear the fire whirring and feel the heat whack you in the face.
  
• Saw Cirque du Soleil Beatles LOVE show at the Mirage at 9:30. Yeah, okay, we overdid it. We were really tired at this point. I had gotten one free ticket through MyVegas so it was basically half price. We were too tired to really enjoy the show. It looked really cool, the costumes and props were spectacular, and the performers were talented, but we just never really got "into" it. We were jet-lagged and had trouble staying awake after our long day. We were in the back row of section 201, and while we could see pretty well, I think being just 3 or 4 rows closer (with a cup of coffee in my hand) would have been an improvement.
  

Day 3 (Fri 10/21)

• Decided to head out of town for Fri-Sat to see Zion and Grand Canyon, to avoid the crowds and higher weekend hotel prices.
  
• Stopped by Donut Bar in downtown on our way out toward Zion. These donuts in there were completely bonkers and we had trouble deciding which ones to get. They were very good. We got a couple extra for the next morning, but they were no good by the second day.
  
• Drove to Zion National Park, parked on the side of the road in a stretch where there were some other cars already parked, and rode the bus to the last stop to hike the Narrows. We both felt this was one of the major highlights of the trip. The hike was exhilarating and a bit challenging without being too frustrating. We had the. best. time. We didn't bother renting any gear and we were totally fine. We wore $8 neoprene fin socks for scuba diving I bought on Amazon with some old beat-up sneakers. This worked great because our feet were warm, and we didn't get blisters because our shoes were already comfortably molded to our feet. A lot of other hikers seemed to be stopping for breaks because they were having trouble with blisters and/or cold feet. We scavenged for walking sticks down at the entrance to the narrows. I had read there were usually some left there from previous hikers. My husband found a scrap of 1x2 and I found a pool cue. They looked a bit silly, but you really just need them for feeling around in the water. I doubt the sticks they had for rent would really be a vast improvement.
  
• Waited on a long line to get a bus back to the front of the park. A lady mentioned something about some kind of school holiday in the area, so maybe that's why there were so many people there.
  
• Went back to our car to find a $50 parking ticket. Damn!
  
• Drove up the scenic drive overlooking the park on the way out. It was a bit too dark to see very well at that point, but we got a bit of the view.
  
• Drove to Page, AZ for the night. Stayed at Best Western - View of Lake Powell at $94/night. I don't stay at Best Western a lot, so I don't know what they are usually like, but this was much nicer than I expected for the price! It was situated atop a hill overlooking Lake Powell.
  

Day 4 (10/22)

• Stopped by Wahweap Marina on Lake Powell to check out the views of the lake. It was very beautiful and serene here. Not too many people, either. Would be great if you have a boat.
  
• Stopped for pictures of Glen Canyon Dam, the dam that forms the lake. Cool dam.
  
• Drove to Horseshoe bend and hiked the short hike to the edge. Definitely worth a stop. Lots of photo ops. There were more people here than I expected, but plenty of rocks to climb on for everyone.
  
• Had reserved a spot on a tour of Antelope Canyon, but skipped it because we had decided to sleep in somewhat late that morning. Maybe next time. Heard good things from other travelers.
  
• Drove to Grand Canyon National Park and followed the route along the south rim, stopping at the various viewpoints (Desert View Watchtower, Navajo Point, Lipan Point, Grandview Point). It was a beautiful day to see the Grand Canyon. Ate a bag lunch at one of the overlooks. I was a bit sick with a cold and unable to hike long, but enjoyed some light walking along the Rim Trail starting at South Kaibab. If I come back in the future and I'm not sick, I'd like to do some more rigorous hiking. For our purposes on this trip, one day at the Grand Canyon was sufficient.
  
• Rode a bus to one last viewpoint for sunset. I believe it was called Hopi Point. It was a bit crowded, but a very nice view.
  
• Had some mediocre pizza at a place called We Cook Pizza and Pasta. I can't say I recommend it. It tasted a lot like frozen pizza. There really wasn't any restaurant in town we could find with decent reviews online except RP's Stage Stop, but that one closed at 5pm, so we had to settle.
  
• Stayed at Best Western again-- Best Western Primier Grand Canyon Squire Inn, in Tusayan, at $106/night. We were able to upgrade to the newest building for free by signing up for Best Western Rewards. This was another pleasant surprise! Our room was very nice, and everything was brand new. The main building had a little bowling alley and arcade, where we ran into a couple from Ireland we had encountered already at Penn and Teller and Caesar's Palace in Vegas. What are the chances of that?
  

Day 5 (Sun 10/23)

• Drove from Tusayan toward the Hoover Dam and pulled off at Williams, AZ for breakfast. This was an unplanned stop that we really enjoyed. Williams really plays up the Route 66 and "small town USA" nostalgia. We ate at Pine Country Restaurant simply because it looked popular. Our meal was very good. We enjoyed strolling down the main street for a little bit and popped in a few kitschy little gift shops.
  
• Visited the Hoover Dam. We looked at the dam from the bridge, then looked at the bridge from the dam. It is a very impressive sight, and definitely worth pulling off the highway to see it. We impulsively decided to go on the dam tour after we chatted with some people finishing up the tour who gave it glowing reviews. It was a decent dam tour, but we probably could have done without the dam tour. It was interesting, but crowded and a bit anticlimactic, in my opinion.
  
• Drove back to Las Vegas and checked into Excalibur. Definitely a step down from where we were, but not too terrible. The location was good, and the price was right. I booked two nights at $44/night with a $30 dining credit using a promo code from smartervegas.com, and the third night was free via MyVegas points. My research had indicated that the "Royal Tower" was newly renovated, so we requested a room in that tower at check-in. The lobby and hallways looked like they needed an update, but our room was pretty nice once we were in there. I had no major complaints, except that the TV gave us some trouble and Robert Irvine from "Restaurant Impossible" was peering into our window at all hours. We didn't hang out in the casino much because the service wasn't great. There were a lot of glasses and ashtrays laying around, and the machines had trouble reading vouchers. We did enjoy the $5 blackjack tables, which were a little bit harder to find elsewhere.
  
• Went on a club crawl. This was unnecessary. I booked it through Groupon in advance, thinking it would save money on cover, but we were handed a lot of "free entry" passes from club promoters on the street to get into decent clubs, so we didn't really need it. It would be good to go this route if you had a group of all males, or if you were going out on a busy weekend night, or if you just wanted to meet a group of random people. In the end, we just ended up spending half the night trying to track down our group (of about 12 male accountants who already knew each other), which wasn't really worth it.
  

Day 6 (Mon 10/24)

• Went to check out the older casinos downtown this day. Downtown was a bit more rough around the edges than the strip (as expected), but still worth the visit.
  
• My schedule had an option have breakfast at The Beat, but we decided to sleep in instead.
  
• Went to lunch at Carson Kitchen. It was raining, and everyone was kind of freaking out about how it was raining. The place was mostly empty, so we got a great seat at the counter where we could watch the chef working and see all of the food coming out. Everything we had was delicious. Everything we saw coming out looked like it would be delicious, too. Our waiter was good. He insisted we get the bread pudding, because it would change our lives. It did.
  
• Walked to Fremont Street and played the vintage slots at The D. We enjoyed a bay of penny slot machines with some sort of Inferno/Devil theme and won a bit of money. We also played the vintage horse derby machine, which ate up a bunch of our money but was a fun time. There was a lot of screaming and cheering going on.
  
• Popped into Golden Nugget and watched the shark tank for a bit. We were surprised at the number of sharks they fit in there. Very interesting to watch. Also looked at the giant gold nugget on our way out (it's just a giant gold nugget).
  
• Ate dinner at Itsy Bitsy Ramen and Whiskey. We had a Groupon again. This place was virtually empty as well (maybe it was the rain?) but was also very good. My bowl of Ramen was big enough to swim in, and the broth was perfect.
  
• Walked back to Fremont Street to watch the Fremont Experience light show at 7. It was some kind of weird alien show and the graphics weren't great, but the scale was impressive. The Slotzilla zipliners were fun to watch and added to the festiveness.
  
• Went to Banger Brewing Company because I had a Groupon to use on a flight of beers and a couple pints. We had a reservation to go on their free tour earlier in the day, but missed it because we completely forgot about it. Oops. Either way, sitting at a table in the bar to drink our beer was a good little break from the sensory overload. We sat and played a couple board games while people-watching through the window.
  
• Grabbed a couple of cocktails at The Golden Tiki. Groupon again. Just a fun little tiki bar. I had something with Dole Whip which was pretty good. It was the most busy place we had seen all day, but we were still able to find an empty table.
  
• Went back to the strip to see the Cosmopolitan. This is a very impressive, glitzy hotel. If I were to describe it in one word, it would be "sparkly." We had fun looking for the Secret Pizza restaurant. We tried to not cheat too much in looking for hints online. We were on the guest list to go to Marquee, but were too tired to get dressed up and go to a club at this point.
  
• Walked the middle part of the strip on foot. Walked farther north than we planned. Stopped in the Piano Bar at Harrah's and sang along with a few oldies. The pianist was entertaining and worked his own funny/dirty lyrics into the songs. Even more fun to watch was the crowd getting really into it. People from all walks of life belting out songs in unison. We didn't stay very long because there was nowhere for us to sit.
  

Day 7 (Tues 10/25)

• Had lunch at Capo's Speakeasy. I got a voucher on Travelzoo for $30 worth of food for $15 with a sign up discount of $10 off. I figured for $5, I'd be happy with anything. You need a password to get in. Well, kind of. It's silly and fun. They were playing some hilariously over-the-top old mob movies on the TVs. The food was pretty good and portions were generous. I really, really liked the fries drizzled with sauce.
  
• Visited the Wynn. It is a very pleasant place. Saw the flower sculptures, parasols, lake, and water features. We weren't here too long. Just wanted to check it out.
  
• Visited the Grand Canal Shoppes. Watched the gondolas and some performers milling about. Got a piece of chocolate from a guy on stilts.
  
• Visited the Palazzo. Admired the waterfall in the atrium. Visited the casino and won some money on a Britney Spears slot machine. Thus began our addiction to Britney Spears slot machines.
  
• Showed up at to the Flamingo to see a show by a guy called Jeff Civillico. Turns out, his show is cancelled through the end of the year. No biggie. The tickets were cheap on Travelzoo. They said they had already sent refunds out. I must have missed the memo. Went to look at the live flamingos for a few minutes instead. This wasn't bad, but nothing spectacular. A bit smelly.
  
• Went to Paris, walked around, and did a bit of gambling. Britney was good to us again. There was a live band playing on one side of the casino and some random exotic dancers on a bar in the middle.
  
• Had dinner at Hexx with a Groupon (of course). We had a reservation and were sat out on the deck with a good view for people watching. Our food and service were very good. We had some fries that had a bunch of gravy and stuff on top that looked like a total mess but tasted really good.
  
• Went to the top of the Eiffel Tower with a Groupon (duh) for $30 for 2. There was no line. We just had to wait for the elevator to come down. We got to the top a bit before 9pm. Of all the views of the strip we saw, this was probably my favorite. You're high enough to see everything, but low enough to hear the hustle and bustle and street performers below. The view of the Bellagio fountains from above is spectacular. We caught 2 full shows. We were even able to see the Mirage fire show again at 9.
  
• Went back downstairs to the bar at Hexx for cocktails. I had a voucher for BOGO specialty cocktails from MyVegas. They were decent. We didn't really need them, though.
  
• Went into Omnia at Caesar's Palace for a little while, mostly just to see it. Very cool atmosphere. Very crowded, even early in the night. Male to female ratio was off, if that's important to you, but that didn't matter to us.
  

Day 8 (Wed 10/26)

• Had lunch at Tacos El Gordo. We had no idea how to order, but whatever tacos we ended up with were very good and authentic. The line wasn't too bad when we got there around 11:30. We ordered 6 tacos, but probably would have liked a couple more because they were small. The line was too long by the time we finished to bother getting more, though.
  
• Popped into Peppermill Fireside Lounge nearby, just for a few minutes, out of curiosity. Very cozy, retro-looking little place with little fires at the booths in the lounge. The restaurant seemed to be popular at lunchtime.
  
• Last stop was Treasure Island. There wasn't much to see here in terms of sightseeing except a pirate ship out front and few artsy pieces here and there, but we read it was one of the better casinos on the strip for low rollers like ourselves. We found a $5 blackjack table with a 3 to 2 payout. I hadn't seen many of those on the strip. I started with $20 and walked away with a little over $80. You know we hit those Britney slots one more time before we left, too.
  
• I headed back to the airport to fly back home while my husband stayed for work the next day.
  

Thanks for reading! I might try to come back and add some pictures and links here as I get the chance. Feel free to ask me about anything we did!

Returned to Philadelphia from Las Vegas yesterday morning on the red-eye, and after about 18 hours of sleep, I'm ready to write up my trip report. This was my first time back to Las Vegas since 2007 and I had a lot of fun.
I receive email promotions from the MLife casinos, and the one that caught my eye was an offer for a $50 dining credit per night at Aria. Since Aria opened an outpost of Carbone in November, I read the fine print of the offer to make sure Carbone wasn't excluded from the offer.

Saturday

My flight was delayed and I didn't make it to the hotel until about 1 am. Earlier in the day, Aria emailed me about online check-in, and I decided to do it just to make sure I'd at least have a place to sleep that night. When I was assigned a room on the eighth floor, I decided to go to the check-in desk to see if I could do better.
I did the $20 sandwich and asked for "anything with an awesome bathroom." The woman who checked me in put me on the 54th floor with a strip view, one room away from the elevator. SCORE.
Because I checked in so late, the front desk attendant credited the third night of my dining credit to the final day of my stay.

Sunday

Slept in and headed directly to my spa appointment at noon for a facial. When I checked in for the facial, I asked if I could be fit in for a mani and pedi too. They scheduled me for a 3 pm appointment.
The Spa at Aria is huge, quiet, tranquil, and relaxing. After the facial, I killed two hours in the spa reading magazines, eating snacks and drinking green tea, napping on vibrating chairs in the salt room (a dark room lined with gently warmed Himalayan salt bricks), and fielding work emails on my iPad by the private outdoor infinity edge pool.
When I returned to my room, I found that housekeeping had come and gone and left me extra towels as I requested along with my nice tip. (I was glad I asked for extra towels, since housekeeping never came back to my room during the rest of my stay. Hmph.)
I ate dinner at the bar at Julian Serrano Tapas in the Aria lobby (tasty patatas bravas, an uninspired beet salad with commodity Sysco croutons, 6/10). I didn't have plans for Sunday night, so at the last minute, I decided to roll the dice at the concierge and see if they could get me tickets for Jerry Seinfeld at Caesars.
Let me recognize Tatiana the concierge at Aria by name here because she was so helpful, friendly, and resourceful. She got me fantastic seats for Jerry Seinfeld for way less than I expected to spend, and found a gift card that had been left for me at the concierge desk under the wrong name. I gave her a tip and called her manager to compliment her.
(Sidebar: Did you know the Society of the Crossed Keys is a real thing? Tatiana was wearing the gold keys pins on her uniform...I thought it was just something Wes Anderson made up for the Grand Budapest Hotel. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
After Jerry's set, I walked back to Aria from Caesars. I stopped at the Caesars sports book and put $20 on the Panthers to beat Navy...I should have just torn up that $20 bill. I also stopped at Olives on the Via Bellagio and sat at the bar and had dessert and a nightcap, and as I was walking back to Aria I watched the fountain show for "Luck be a Lady," my favorite of the fountain shows.
To get back to Aria, I walked through Crystals and closed down the bar at Todd English Pub (extensive but confusing beer list, OK fries, talked Coachella and exchanged instagram handles with Channa the sweet bartender and her boyfriend, 8/10.)
The art at Aria and Crystals is kind of banal (Dale Chihuly...yawn) but it was a lot of fun to take a bunch of drunk Hotline Bling selfies in the James Turrell installation by the tram station on the third floor. Go late and you can dance like Drake to your heart's content!
I wasn't ready for bed yet, so I stopped at Alibi at Aria for a cocktail and had an excellent chocolate martini garnished with Cocoa Puffs.

Monday

Up early for Dig This! I had a 10 am appointment to operate the excavator and after some confusion by the cab driver ("Turn off the meter and let me out, I'll walk the rest of the way because you obviously don't know where you're going!") I made it just in time for the safety briefing.
I cannot talk up Dig This enough--it was ridiculously fun. Junior, the instructor, was patient and upbeat even if he had to tell me "no, your RIGHT hand...no, your OTHER right" fifty times. There were two other people in my group and we all had fun encouraging and zinging each other while operating the excavators. We were welcome to take all the pictures we wanted with our cameras and phones and I actually bought the $30 plaque with a professional photo of me in the excavator afterward. (And tipped Junior, of course.)
I Ubered back to the strip to eat lunch at Hash House a Go Go at the Linq, but the line was so long and the space so grim and uninspiring I ended up eating lunch at Guy Fieri on the strip. My Mayor of Flavortown burger was fine; I'd eaten at Guy Fieri Chophouse in Atlantic City before so I knew what to expect.
After lunch, I walked back to Aria and put $20 in a Hangover penny machine before taking a nap and getting ready for my 6:30 dinner reservation at Carbone. Since I read Pete Wells' review of the original New York location in the Times I'd wanted to eat there.
A word about the space at Carbone: opulent. It hearkens back to old-timey New York/Las Vegas Italian restaurants--red velvet booths, an enormous crystal chandelier in the dining room, massive fresh flower arrangements in gigantic brass urns on the bar.
The portions at Carbone are famously huge, so I had to order wisely--the clams three ways and the spicy rigatoni were delicious, but the minestrone was thin and weirdly green. For dessert, I ordered the carrot cake with ginger ice cream and it was the best piece of carrot cake I've ever eaten.
All the reviews of Carbone talk up the service (you get a table captain instead of a server), but I found it to be inattentive and impersonal: The host tried to seat me at the bar instead of a table in the dining room because I was dining alone, I was disappointed that I wasn't offered the complimentary nip of limoncello and rainbow cookies the other tables around me received after the meal...and nobody said thank you or goodbye when I signed for the bill or walked out of the restaurant! What the hell?!
(Not that I was able to take advantage of this, but the women's restrooms at Carbone would make a great place for a quickie.)
Carbone overall: Food 8/10. Service 6/10.
Hopped in a cab after dinner and headed to PH for Britney. Even on a Monday night, PH was SLAMMED with people. The plexiglas cases with her famous costumes in the lobby (the red leather jumpsuit from Oops I Did it Again, the blue flight attendant costume from the Toxic video, even her dress from when she was on Star Search) were a treat to see.
I received Britney tickets as a Christmas gift, and my seat was awesome, though expensive at almost $300. The seats are raked so even if you stand up to dance you're not blocking someone in front of you. Some of the arrangements of her songs were kind of weird--the crowd didn't know when to get hyped for her big hits. But Britney herself seemed lively and engaged and looked great. I grabbed a few of the custom Britney poker chip confetti that blasted over the crowd at the end of the show.
As I was leaving I noticed I was seated two rows closer to the stage than Dave Grohl, who was wearing a white crushed velvet dinner jacket and bow tie. (Me: "How's the foot?" Dave: "Healing!")

Tuesday

Tuesday morning, I paid $30 for 3 pm checkout and headed downtown to The Mob Museum. I've never been to downtown Las Vegas before and I was surprised the cabs cost me around $30 each way after tip--locals, did I get longhauled?
The Mob Museum is very well done, with lots of memorabilia and well-produced exhibits about the history of Las Vegas, law enforcement, gambling, and of course, organized crime. I thought there were WAY too many people in the museum for it to be enjoyable, though. Go early.
Ended my stay with lunch at Crystals at Cucina Wolfgang Puck (a much better beet salad than at Julian Serrano and a side of meatballs, 7/10) and bought myself a scarf at Hermés.
When I checked out, the manager credited the $50/night dining credit as a flat $150 to the total bill instead of just to food. I was OK with that. But I learned that at check-in, the woman who checked me in charged my Amex up front for the full balance of my hotel room plus another $350 for a "security deposit." I have no idea why she did that, and neither did the woman who checked me out.
Headed to the airport early to unwind in The Centurion Lounge (shoutout to the homies in /churning), which happened to be right across from my gate. There was a nice buffet and a free full bar to take advantage of, but unfortunately for me I'm a nervous flyer and I didn't want to eat or drink anything other than water before my flight. But I made friends with a showgirl waiting for her flight too!
Finally, I want to thank all of the /vegas redditors for their advice while I was planning this trip. Your answers to my questions (and ErnDizzy's well-done trip report) helped me cram as much fun into three days as I did.
TL; DR version: Aria nice but needs to work on the details; The Spa at Aria is a terrific place to chill; good food at Carbone but service was lacking on my visit; Dig This--unforgettable! A must-do; when Britney's on, she's firing on all cylinders; The Mob Museum is well done but go early.

Well, I did it!! My husband and I got married on Saturday in Las Vegas. It was great! I don't have any pics from my photographer yet but here's a pic of us a friend took at dinner after the ceremony. Here's what I learned...

1. I did not expect to be as busy as I was for the few days before the wedding and after the wedding! My husband and I made hotel gift bags for all our guests and we greeted them with the bag when they got in. We had about 46 people attend our wedding and we created 20 bags. However, greeting all those people and giving them the bags took a lot of time. I'm really glad we did it though because it ensured that we saw all our guests and that we could convey how glad we were that they came to the wedding and we were able to do some socializing as well with people we hadn't seen in awhile. But for anyone planning on doing this, it probably took us a solid day to do this for all our guests.
   
2. Be picky about pictures that you want. I really wanted a picture by the Bellagio fountains and considering that it was a holiday weekend, Vegas was super super busy. It took us about 30 minutes to drive there and we only had to go a few blocks. But once we got there we were able to get a great spot and some fantastic pictures. So even though my husband was not wanting to do the pictures, he was glad after we did them because these will probably end up being among our favorites. But if I hadn't insisted on it several times, we wouldn't have done it. So I'm glad I did!
   
3. Makeup. I had figured out beforehand how I wanted my hair done but for some reason I hadn't even thought about makeup! So I had to decide on the spot and I really liked how it turned out but I wish I would have looked into that beforehand.
   
4. Name change. So I took today off of work assuming I would work on name change stuff today but I didn't realize that it takes about 10 days for the license to process before I can order one and then I can start the name change process. Oh well, it just means that today I have a nice chill day to relax (which I am seriously loving!) but I do wish I would have known that beforehand so I would recommend finding that out from your county clerk's office just so you know.
   
5. Ask where photography can take place. I had read beforehand that the hotels on the strip don't allow photography inside so I thought we had to do all our pictures outside. However, our photographers asked the hotel people and we found out that we can take pictures anywhere in the hotels as long as it isn't a casino area. It was so great! I'm so glad they asked!
   
6. Flower girl and ring bearer. Our flower girl was a year and a half old and our ring bearer was 2 years 8 months old. I was worried about them walking down the aisle by themselves so I had my ring bearer walk down the aisle with his mom, my sister, who was also a bridesmaid. And he did awesome, he handled it like a pro and looked so cute too! The flower girl was supposed to walk with them as well and she did good for a bit until she saw everyone looking at her and then she freaked out and ran back to her mom at the entrance. So then her mom took her down the aisle which worked out. But I had specifically asked the flower girl's parents for a backup plan in case she wouldn't walk by herself and it did end up being needed. So I would recommend, depending on how young your flower girl/ring bearer are, to have a backup plan if they won't walk down by themselves.
   
7. The last thing that I can think of is just to spend time with your guests. We got in on August 28th and left on September 1st (2 days after our wedding) and we made sure that while we were there, we spent time with all of our guests. We had people travel from everywhere to come to the wedding, I even had an aunt come in from Australia! But everyone had to drive or fly in so we made sure that even though we wanted time to ourselves, we spent some time with our guests. We were able to do that with everyone and yet people still had time for their own things as well but I do know that people appreciated being able to hang out with us. We had to initiate a few things after our wedding because people were trying to leave us alone, but we were glad we got together with our friends and family after the wedding.
   

And that's all I can think of for now! Overall, it was a super busy weekend but it was amazing!!! I'm still getting used to using the word husband but I think I'll adjust quickly. :)